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Lately I've been clouded with these thoughts in my head. I can't quite fully understand them. I need the key to the key hole. Its not there, where did it go. Why won't you tell me whats on your mind. Why won't you tell me whats really going on. Why are you scared to show your true feelings/emotions towards me. Don't be scared cause I'm just as scared as you are. Sometimes I can't take you serious at all and it so frustrating. Its like trying to untighen a bottle of jam but my hands are too slippery. I can't get that strong grasp of you, and it kills me inside. I don't know if you can understand how much I care for you. You say I don't know

just take my hand lately i've been staying up til these ridiculous times spending most of the evening kicking back watching sappy ass romance flicks. i'm one huge emotional bag of shit so i end up crying in the end. more than anything i do love to watch romance flicks more than a good bloody gore movie or the gut wrenching comdey action drama movie thats out. those movies are good for the time being to do something while your bored, but watching a film that inspires and reignite a flame that was one out, well man thats alot! i always try to find the silverlining meaning of the films. you can learn from the movies, yet not everything is true

oh boy i haven't written a blog in over a year, i don't know whats compelling me to write. i guess i just had this sudden urge to write, so thus forth i'll get to my point. after devoting a solid year and two months to beauty college, i felt a great achievement. rewarded myself with a pat on the back and a smile on my face. i thought post-grad that i'd feel alot more happier since i'd have this immense amount of free time on my hands. it certainly didn't turn into that. it became the opposite. i should be the one to blame, since all i do is watch movies all day and be a couch potato. i haven't gone out looking for a job at all. with this ec